Agentspeak

Link via Maud:
From David Milofsky's piece on literary agents:
"The following glossary, offered with tongue in cheek, might help literary hopefuls decipher messages received from agents in response to their work:

Interesting - Boring
Has potential - Amateurish
Moving - Show it to Mom
Needs work - Hopeless
Mid-list - Won't sell
Intelligent - See "interesting"
Ambitious - Too long
Spare - Too short
Poetic - Insomniacs only
Plot-driven - Superficial
Excellent - Possible, with a rewrite
Cinematic - Unreadable
Marketable - People will buy anything
Challenging - See "poetic"
At this time (as in, we can't use it at this time) - Never
Experimental - In your dreams
Character-driven - No story
Novel of ideas - No one will read it
Talented - How did you get in here?"